Scarlett Johansson is the new Lara Croft

Scarlett Johansson is the new Lara Croft. After a very long and thoughtful decisional process, the producers of the new movie with the female version of Indiana Jones, that will be called "Lara Croft and the surgical upgrade of the Kali's cleavage", finally became convinced that Scarlett is the right choice. But what an effort! Infact, we must remember at the loyal readers who are the others suitors to this role: Bill Kaulitz, Kristen Stewart, Lindsay Lohan and Dita Von Teese.

Bill Kaulitz is the new Lara Croft

Bill Kaulitz is the new Lara Croft. Bill Kaulitz, the singer of Tokyo Hotel, is the new Lara Croft. The rockstar will portray on the screen the famous heroin of the videogames and we are sure that he will be at the better of his, actorial capacities. No more chances for the other pretenders.

Kristen Stewart is the new Lara Croft

Kristen Stewart is the new Lara Croft. Kristen Stewart will portray the most celebrated grave's predator of the story of videogames, Lara Croft, precisely. Kristen Stewart accepted the role after the painful end of her relation with Robert Pattinson, who has lost no time to find a new girlfriend. Poor Kristen, forced to drown her sufferings in the job.

Lindsay Lohan is the New Lara Croft

Lindsay Lohan is the New Lara Croft. The famous actress, singer and model, known for her legal problems and drugs rehabilitation, will be the New Lara Croft on the set of The Planet of the Mutant Clitorises, a Foreskin Production with a budget of one billion dollar.

Dita Von Teese is the new Lara Croft

Dita Von Teese is the new Lara Croft. The queen of burlesque will portray the popular heroin of the videogames, the most desired mass of poligons, Lara Croft, precisely. The voices on this new chapter of the Tomb Raider saga were quoted by a very long list of gossip sites and none of the Dita Von Teese staff denied.